The Shadow is a psychological term coined by Swiss psychologist Carl Jung. It is the “dark side” of our repressed personality that we tend to hide from others. Our selfishness, sexual lust, greed, anger and more negative human emotions can be found within our Shadow selves. I’ve been thinking a lot about it recently.

Deep within me is the person I hate the most that will forever be with me until the day I die. That person is everything that I do not like about myself and I would do anything to have it dead. But killing it will basically be killing myself. We’re both tied to one another because that person is me. It burns me up how frequently that person rears its ugly head in my daily life from time to time.

I love music and it’s a huge inspiration for me so I’m just going to put it out there: I’m going to do a lot of comparisons to artist and albums here on my blog.

With that said, the opening track, I Thought About Killing You on the 2018 album ye by Kanye West perfectly captures my feelings on the matter. The spoken word portion in the beginning more specifically. If you have not listened to it, I’ll leave a link below. Warning: It contains explicit language.

Today, I seriously thought about killing you
I contemplated, premeditated murder
And I think about killing myself
And I love myself way more than I love you, so…

See, if I was tryin’ to relate it to more people
I’d probably say I’m struggling with loving myself
Because that seems like a common theme
But that’s not the case here
I love myself way more than I love you
And I think about killing myself
So, best believe, I thought about killing you today
Premeditated murder

I love how Kanye shows his two moods: The side that loves only himself and the side that only wants to die.

I done had a bad case of too many bad days
Got too many bad traits

He mentions this within the first verse and I wanted to point out how relatable it is as well. These bad traits we exhibit could come directly from our shadows and causes us to be the worst possible person we can be.

I believe we should all call attention to the darkness in our own hearts and focus on how we should improve upon it. I’ve been working on what I can do to help myself so that I can never become my shadow.

This post was inspired by both Sara in LaLaLand and The Strawberry Post. I encourage you to check out their blogs. 🙂